Thursday, September 1, 2011

Ode to a Rumbly Tumbly

Continuing the JAMS project, I started a stub on their lovely actress Ayaka Yuzuki (pictured at right) this morning. Nice, pretty face, scrumptious ass and boobs, of course, but look at that belly! Oh, my, there's a place old Dekkappai would like to lay his weary head... The belly gets little respect these days, but why should a nice, plump, soft belly be any less desirable than ass & boobs with similar tactile and aesthetic qualities? Ms. Yuzuki also has a deep belly button to show off the pleasing tummy-flesh around it. All-in-all quite a beautiful girl-- I'd flip her in a nonce with relish! With a cup of French roast, that was a very nice way to start off the morning. I wasted my afternoon BP work time trying to figure out better how this blog site works. I figured out more, so I suppose it wasn't a total waste. I'll just post at night though, after the evening's editing is done.

The last couple entries in the New Sexy Zone series-- The Super Tits Spy! Huge Tits Blowjob Lady and Huge-Ass Mask, Super Thunder-Thigh Amazon-- have rather amusing little scenarios as pretexts to their pornographic romping. The former is about a buxom, big-assed female spy who infiltrates an enemy country to sit on faces until they begin spilling national secrets. The second has a faithful, large-rear-ended wife fighting predatory credit collectors by transforming into a super heroine and... you guessed it... sitting on their faces. (At left Anna Moriyama deals harshly with bill collectors in Huge-Ass Mask, Super Thunder-Thigh Amazon) I hope these story-based DVDs continue, simply because they make writing a synopsis more fun, but not to the extent that they revert back to the style of the early AVs. The AVs of the '80s were like mini, poorly-made Pink-films: All plot, with just fleeting scenes of nudity and/or sex... and the plots were not interesting, as those of Pink films can be. I enjoy good Pink films as straight films-- that is, films-- period-- which happen to have erotic content. When up for a bit of cinematic entertainment, one doesn't pop on an AV. The AVs address more primitive urges. As early AV idol, Kaoru Kuroki put it, they are "a bit like eating and menus in restaurants: you're hungry and you have a sudden craving for noodles, so you go and eat noodles. Your appetite is towards a porno video, so you go and rent whatever turns you on. And as with food, viewers can use basic ingredients to 'cook' the desired stimulation from the video themselves." (quoted in Bornoff, Nicholas (1994) [1991]. "Bye-Bye Pink Cinema, Hello Adult Video". Pink Samurai: An Erotic Exploration of Japanese Society; The Pursuit and Politics of Sex in Japan (Paperback ed.). London: HarperCollins. ISBN 0-586-20576-4.)

Pink films don't work this way. Does anyone really find the films of Hisayasu Satou to be arousing in any way whatsoever? I sure as Hell don't, in fact I find them to be anti-erotic. The cinematic equivalent of a cold shower. (Which made it all the more irritating when some Wikipedian crusader tried to paint me as a monster for starting articles on Satou's films, claiming I was "wanking off" to Satou's cinematic atrocities. That type of smearing-by-association is an old trick among totalitarian thugs, and so, naturally, it's commonplace at Wikipedia.) Yet they are very interesting films-- some of the best Pink films I've seen. I'd watch any one of them before I'd sit down and watch an entire AV... which would be, to stretch the metaphor of the astute Ms. Kuroki a little, like eating everything on a menu...

At night I started bio-stubs on a couple more actresses in the New Sexy Zone series which finishes my work on that series for now. Next project: the BOMC / Bon Bon Cherry series. The BP server started acting badly, so I spent the rest of the evening's editing time making preparations for that work. I had already downloaded all the DVD covers. I cropped out front covers for the templates, and started picking screenshots for the articles. Starting at the end (BOMC-028), I worked back to #16.

Calling it quits early, I watched Boys of the City-- an East Side Kids epic. I never was a fan of them, but my son likes them, and it's getting hard to persuade him to watch the good old crap with me these days. I watch the new crap with him at the theaters. Boys of the City has the Kids in a haunted house in the country, with murders, gangsters, and other clichés of low-brow 1940s comedy. The only thing missing to make it a complete encyclopedia of '40s crap-comedy-cliché is a guy in a really bad gorilla suit. (The Three Stooges must have had that gorilla suit tied up during the filming of Boys of the City.) The eye-rolling, knee-shaking, stammering "darkie" cliché was there in all its embarrassing glory, in the person of Ernest "Sunshine Sammy" Morrison. "Ah ain't afraid o' none o' dem ghostesses... ah's a-SCEERED ob 'em!"-type witticisms. I tried hard to be offended, but to tell the truth, "Sunshine Sammy" was the most entertaining character in the movie. Apparently Sammy had been in Hal Roach's silent Our Gang films. After his work with the East End Kids he went off to the war, then declined an offer to join the Bowery Boys when they were starting up that series. Too bad he didn't stick with them through the Bowery Boys years, toning down the stereotype, of course... Leo Gorcey hadn't quite developed his instrument yet. Just came off as a smart-ass kid most of the time. "Sunshine Sammy" obviously had talent, but that's probably as far as he could get in Hollywood of that day-- burying his face in watermelon and smacking his lips. Anyway, Boys wasn't as bad as expected. Not especially good, but not too bad. Click here and take a look at it for free at the Internet Archive.

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